Wednesday, February 20, 2008

Gordon Ramsey, Cleavage, Me, and a Kitchen Nightmare in Stamford

Stamford will give you what you want if you look.
I want culture, and I want excitement.
I went on Saturday morning to the Avon Film Festival (culture) and stumbled upon the reality show Kitchen Nightmares (excitement).

I’d never heard of the show, but the premise is to take a failing restaurant and turn it around. Despite zealous protests from my husband, I got our name on the list for Tuesday.

After signing our model release form and getting our pictures taken, we were the first ones in the downstairs eating area. We were met by a nervous waiter, soon followed by Gordon Ramsay, who wanted to know what we thought of the gaudy waterfall sculpture on the wall. “It’s nice!” I said. When I’m nervous, I smile and make cheerful conversation.
G: “No it’s not, it’s hideous!”
Me: “Well- it doesn’t match anything else in the restaurant.”
G: “It’s hideous. You’ve got to tell the owner to get rid of it.”

After a few minutes, I got used to the 2 men in black looming over me with a large camera and boom mike. We weren’t given any instructions on how to act, so I just acted like a person eating dinner. It seemed to go over well.
When a course arrived, or even a bread basket, the cameramen swooped in. They were completely silent, so I figured I wouldn’t talk to them either. We each pretended the other didn’t exist. From what I’ve seen of reality TV, that’s what you do. I really like reality TV: Supernanny, America’s Next Top Model, America’s Biggest Loser and Project Runway are all on my TiVo.

In my reality TV debut, I ignored the cameras, flirted with my husband, swilled my Metropolitan, and cleaned my plate.

The camera spent a lot of time on a brunette with enviable cleavage.

Actually, I just this second went to chowhound, where I posted,

“A-
I think I was sitting right across from you... were you the blond, or the brunette with the great cleavage? (If you're the blond, maybe you have great cleavage too, it just wasn't facing me.)
Ha!
Gordon was adorable- hot, even. The beef special was well done on the outside and almost completely raw on the inside. The meat itself was tasty though. I got some good 'camera in the face' time, but I'm not sure if my husband's and my awkward conversation will make for a good TV clip.
My waiter was wonderful despite the cameras following him around. The owner was nervous but attentive, not in a terrible, annoying way. He seemed very likable. I hope this show helps the restaurant.
I think my favorite part of the evening, besides a very nice Merlot, was when Gordon Ramsay insisted on carrying a baby carriage up the stairs-- with the sleeping baby in it.”

Rather than try to write a clever entry that flows well, I’m just going to post this. It’s short, it’s honest, and I have to get ready to go to the Oscar Film Shorts at the Avon tonight!

A, if you are not the cleavage-bearer, let me know. Or, if you want me to take mention of your cleavage off the blog, email me. I’m assuming since you wore the shirt, you are proud of your cleavage. I would be!

8 comments:

Lambira said...

Well, I'm not much with the cleavage...last time I was sized at Victoria's secret, I think the girls were about an A, MAYBE pushing a B. I'm more writing to comment on Project Runway. HUGE fan. I got to go to a few fashion shows in Bryant Park - went to Luca Luca and Reem Acra - and I saw Tim Gunn and Nina Garcia live. I thought I was going to hyperventilate. I'm such a dork.

Can't wait to see the Kitchen Nightmares ep. did they say when it would air???

Stamford Talk said...

Oh shoot, Project Runway probably just finished tonight.
I don't know when the Stamford episode will air, but I'll be on the lookout, and if you hear anything, let me know!

holly said...

What an awesome idea for a blog!! Thanks for stopping in to see my little space, I'm humbled and I'll take your suggestion about paragraphs too, I do tend to run on! My Creative Writing teacher would be mortified!!!

Stamford Talk said...

Hee hee- I actually am a creative writing teacher.

Amanda said...

So you know now I'm not the brunette with nice cleavage -- BUT in case you're interested...its some push up type bra with these liquid filled cups. We had a discussion before dinner about it :)

Also, when we stepped outside and were chatting with the people working out there, they said the ep *might* air sometime mid-summer. It may be even later though due to the writers strike.

I'm curious to see if anyone went last night for what I'm guessing was the re-launch.

Stamford Talk said...

I will definitely be going to check it out in the next couple of weeks. Should be interesting, huh?

Chris said...

Hey, I think that was my son in the stroller! Which night were you there?

This might just be little Jack's first mention on the Internet (besides my blog, of course)...

Stamford Talk said...

I was there Tuesday... little does Kitchen Nightmares know how many Stamford Talkers infiltrated them that night.

I wonder if Jack will make the cut and appear on the TV show! Did it make you nervous when Gordon carried Jack up all those stairs? Don't people usually take babies out of strollers for that?