Thursday, October 30, 2008

Curses Upon Norwalk, Halloween, and Traffic

I credit my husband for shepherding me through my foul mood this evening. I've been headachy and tired the past couple of days, so by evening, I'm fried. Tonight, my husband did not fall prey to my whining and pity-partying. He did not let me ruin his mood, and then he helped me blow up purple balloons for my Halloween costume. (I'm a bunch of grapes.)

The afternoon started off innocently enough. I drove to Norwalk at 4pm- only a 6 mile back up from exits 9 to 15- not bad, because often it's a 14 mile back up! I got my purple shirt (base of grape bunch) at American Apparel in SoNo, then decided to take the Merritt home so I could swing by CRUMBS and get us some cupcakes for dessert. DISASTER!!!! The Merritt was totally backed up. (See photo- don't worry, I was at a dead stop.) It took me an hour to get from exit 40 to 37 where I exited and took back roads home to Stamford.

Here is what I was thinking as I sat in traffic:
This is why I cannot ever live in Norwalk again.
I want to ram this ATT van in front of me, because my cell service sucks.
I hate everyone.
I am never going to Norwalk again. I'm boycotting it.
I'm tired.
I don't feel good.
I am so frustrated that I feel like sobbing.
It is a miracle of self-control that I am not crying.
I have to make my Halloween costume when I get home and I don't know if I can deal with it emotionally.

It's 9pm and we sort of finished my costume. I'm going to have to have my coworkers pin my grapes on me when I get to work in the morning. I certainly can't drive with 30 balloons pinned to my torso. Yes, I'm going to work in costume. I'm not sure I could survive the day in normal clothes, because I have to spend 7 hours in a building with 750 11-13 year olds, most of whom will be in costume. All you can hope to do is to out-crazy them. That's why I'm going looking like I have 30 purple boobs. I'm also hoping my grapes will form a protective Zen bubble around me.


Julie said...

Sorry! Did you at least get to Crumbs? If not, want to swing by tomorrow night or Saturday? I love the grapes idea! I wish I could dress up for work but I think people might be a little put off if their courtroom clerk was wearing a cape and witch's hat.

gms said...

That's the StamfordTalk girl we've come to know and love!

Forget the cooing about Peanut Butter cupcakes, this is the real FC! Self absorbed, obsessively entitled people, driving badly.

May your grapes enliven every party you attend, and may you avoid jolly green giants looking to squish you between their gigantic toes to make themselves a satisfying beverage.

Anonymous said...

Aw, poor Norwalk. Such hatred. ;)

Anonymous said...

I feel Stamford Talk's comment "All you can hope to do is out-crazy them" is just an appropriate motto to live by in this chaotic Northeast.

Amanda said...

I guess you didn't know Havana Jeans is now selling American Apparel? :(

Anonymous said...

Spend some time with Google maps and find your way through the back country of darien/new canaan. It is easy to get from Stamford all the way to Fairfield on backroads. Norwalk is easy.

Anonymous said...

You're so angry..just like me...I am a ranter...should start my own blog!

Melina said...

get ye a good GPS with traffic reports....its not perfect but Ive saved alot of time with mu Nuvi and the detour button!...I also avoid the merritt as a quick way to little mistake and the whole thing is closed for hours!and there arent enough exits to be able to correct!
I actually dont mind all of my recent driving and even city traffic because Ive got sirius, I got a voice recorder that I can hook up to dragon naturally speaking and so, conceivably "write" in the car...and the lack of cell service is sometimes a great respite when you get the kind of crap Ive been getting lately...but its just been a hard time.
Hopefully we get a tower in north Stamford and everything gets better.
But, K, everyone knows that Verizon has the best service and the most towers in the area...
Ive tested them side by side and even tho my Mom has ATT for the city and can get a signal at my house, which I cant with verizon, there is a much better signal all around town with Verizon, IMO...of course they are a corporate goliath and incredibly expensive....but, what can we do?