Monday, October 13, 2008

Stamford Football And My Anti-Rudeness Paintball Gun Plan

Before I was struck down by a cold Saturday, I attended a Stamford High football game. Let me get my disillusioned whining out of the way: Stamford High football is nothing like the West Texas football on the TV show Friday Night Lights. There was not a huge crowd, or, at least, the crowd wasn't tightly packed because the stadium is pretty big. That's nice for personal space, but it makes it harder to get swept up in pure football madness. Reality: It was a good game. I was impressed with the QB, who threw several touchdown passes in the first half. Stamford ended up winning 38-27.

The only bad part about the game, besides the coach not being actor Kyle Chandler, was the high school kids. They were OK until halftime, when the opposing team went right through the middle of the bleachers to their locker rooms. The kids lined the bleacher railing by the locker room entry, screamed horrible things, and spit at the other team (photo below). It was a pretty nasty display. It made me worry about the pent-up aggression of Stamford teens.

I'm pretty sure we never did that when I was in high school, but then again, we were in a chill, kinda rural Virginia county. In the FC, as you know, people are aggressive, stressed out, and angry. You don't have to drive around long enough to see people get ugly. I was surprised to see that at a football game though. Kids were shoving past me to go scream in the faces of the other team. I'm fine with a little "You suck!" but spitting is disgusting, and I really don't appreciate big high school boys bumping into me. I don't mean like, they brushed my shoulder. I mean like, I got kneed in the back by some kid who was in a huge hurry to go shout at other teenage boys.

I'm sick of Stamford people pushing me around. I might have to start fighting people. No, I wouldn't do that. I will, though, think about asking the Stamford police for a special dispensation to carry and fire a paintball gun in public. Did I ever blog about that? I got that great idea in August. I'll blog more about it later, but it involves me being a trusted public servant who gets to shoot a paint gun at say, cars who are rude to pedestrians, or people who kick my seat on purpose at the movie theatre. That way, I get the pleasure of physically assaulting people without actually hurting them, and mean people get the message: "That was mean. I saw you. I don't like you. This is your punishment. Don't do it again. Be nicer."

It might seem like I have a little pent-up aggression of my own. But that paintball gun would solve it, and perhaps help bring about a more civil Stamford. Note: I'd make sure that the gun did not look like a real gun. It would look like a happy gun.

15 comments:

Chris Preovolos said...

The last time I was at a football game at SHS, a cop got jumped by a mob. Seriously.

I guess what I'm saying is, it could have been worse.

–CP

East Sider said...

That sucks. You should write a letter to the SHS principal and the school board. Seriously - that's just not cool, and it's not the Black Knights I'm proud of!!!!

Kudos to you for going to the game though. It's really great of you to cheer for your new home team. I wish more new Stamfordites would attend games -- Boyle Stadium is awesome.

(Though it's not nearly as nice now that they have the crappy new fake turf.)

patty said...

Bringing Civility Back to Stamford, One Neon Green Paintball at a Time.

Anonymous said...

Spitting is never cool, unless it's pumkin hoking a loogie at New York on the "Flavor of Love". When I played against Stamford High when I was in High School way back in the 90's, I was spit on as well. The folks from Derby did the same thing when we played them up there.

Anonymous said...

I'm all for the paint ball shooting. It should be legal to shoot cars with the driver on the cell phone. The green paint on their doors would help the police identify the perps.

Anonymous said...

It's been that way at Boyle Stadium for years. In fact, it's also that way at Staples High in Westport, so I'm not just hatin' on Stamford. I wish everyone could be more like the fans at New Canaan High. It's very civilized.

And our team will kick your team's ass.

Julie said...

Spitting is gross! And I totally agree with you about the general population in FC....culture shock for me and I moved here from Boston which doesn't have a rep of being polite to say the least.....

Jonathan "JR" said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Jonathan "JR" said...

I think the spitting was a little much, but I can appreciate the school spirit. I know I did my fair share of yelling at the teams from Commack High School and Siena College.

I hope to see everybody at the Stamford-Westhill rivalry game on Nov. 26th at 6:00.

GO BLACK KNIGHTS!! WOO!!!

Anonymous said...

New Canaan sucks, they didnt play any one. To white to be good

Anonymous said...

Back 20+ years ago the stadium was full and a seat could not be found. We had our share of dirty cheers but no spitting or hitting. It was fun to get together with other students and cheer for the black knights. Of course thats when students had pride in the school not like now.

Anonymous said...

New Canaan is top 5 in the state, lady. And what's with the racist comments about us being "too white"?

Oh, BTW, Stamford lost 21-12 to a Trumbull team that NC beat 41-13...too bad we don't play Stamford this year. We'll just have to wait to pencil in the "W" on the sked until next year.

Stamford Talk said...

Alright, I've got the Stamford-Westhill game in my calendar. Can we go in a little gang, so if I need to beat up any high school boys, I'll have back up?

Anonymous said...

I think kids at SHS have really changed since I've been there, because we NEVER did things such as spitting at the other team at games. It's sad that I only graduated 3 years ago and the kids have changed so much. Don't they realize their behavior is embarrassing not only to the school, but the alums as well?

Also, no offense to the person who commented that New Canaan was top 5 in the state...but this post had nothing to do with New Canaan football...
GO SHS :P

Anonymous said...

None taken. All i was saying was the Stamford student body could take a few etiquette lessons from that of NC. I just threw in the football reference to get a rise out of some people. Great success!

Go RAMS!