Wednesday, March 5, 2008

Coporate Volleyball: Room for All of Us

I have finally- finally!- lied and cheated my way into a corporate volleyball league. I can’t reveal what league or what city my team is in, but if you know the name of this blog, you know where I try to spend most of my time.

Corporate people tend to be pretty efficient, so if your workplace has a team, you should join. You’ll be in and out in an hour, hour and a half max. You’ll leave feeling as if you exercised (you didn’t) and that you’re athletic (you’re not, at least not anymore).

Volleyball will provide you with drama as you sort of spike the ball, or just dink it over the head of some fool who’s trying to block your sort-of-spike.

I’ve never had the deltoid strength to spike, but I can dig like a champ. This week I bravely put myself in the path of the strongest spikes we’ve seen this season. One of my digs impressed my teammates with a sharp smack of ball on forearm heard by the entire gym. That hurt, but the attention I got was so worth it.

Since you can't wear jewelry when you play, everyone appears single. You married people will be treated differently than you're used to. It feels weird, but weird is fun. So, married and single alike, remove all your jewelry for safety's sake. Your corporate volleyball league is the place to be.

Do not forward this post to the captain of your volleyball team. I am sort of legal, although I cannot reveal why.


Anonymous said...

Very amusing post. Any chance you are in the C/D league? My company has a team...won't tell you who, but it's in the C/D.

Stamford Talk said...

I don't know what C/D is... I swear.